Life after the loss of a loved one

Love is important to our happiness in our lives. The Savior said, “…ye love one another; as I have loved you…” (John 13: 34 in the Bible). With deep love comes deep suffering when we lose a loved one. To mourn the loss of a loved one is also part of our earthly experience. The Savior also said, “Thou shalt live together in love, insomuch that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die … And it shall come to pass that those that die in me shall not taste of death, for it shall be sweet unto them;” (Doctrine & Covenants 42: 45-46)

Adjustments in our lives

Here is how one person (Christy Monson) coped with the loss of her husband. She said (I quote part of her article), “As life settled down, the depth of my loss felt all too real. I had to stop myself from putting his cereal bowl on the table and bringing in his paper. I had to take one step at a time. I read my scriptures daily, as I had always done. But that didn’t seem to be enough. I prayed for Heavenly Father’s guidance through this adjustment process. I knew He would hear me. “Whatsoever thing ye shall ask the Father in my name, which is good, in faith believing that ye shall receive, behold, it shall be done unto you” (Moroni 7:26 in the Book of Mormon).

Inspiring words

“When waves of grief overcame me, I repeated scriptures I had memorized. They sank deep into my soul. Sometimes in the middle of the night when I couldn’t sleep, I repeated Proverbs 3:5–6: “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” With the help of the Lord, Peace filled my soul as I meditated on the Savior, His Atonement, and His love for me.

A memorial

“I started to write my husband’s story as a memorial to the goodness of his life. I wanted everyone to remember his magnetic personality, his zeal for the gospel, and his love of the Lord. Memories of things that happened in our lives came back to me, things I would not have thought of on my own, he was close to me.

Self-care

“Even when I didn’t feel like it, I took care of myself physically by eating healthy foods and exercising. My daily walk lessened the anxiety of being alone, and I looked forward to the boost of energy it gave me.

Service

“A neighbor and a dear friend had just lost her husband in a plane accident several months before my husband’s death. We had long talks about the process we were experiencing. We went to church together each week, and she came every Sunday for lunch.

Prayer

“This entire experience has brought me closer to my Heavenly Father. I am in a more spiritual place. I love the promise in Jeremiah 29:13 in the Bible : “And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.” I had sought Heavenly Father with all my heart and knew He would bless me to see more clearly my purpose in life.

Angels nearby

“Loneliness just before bed was very unsettling for me. I began to picture my husband with me especially as I knelt to pray. I felt him close—as an angel near my side—and I was comforted.

Daily peace Is part of my life

My days of overwhelming grief are fewer than they were. I know now this is a path I will walk for the rest of my life. My loneliness has subsided some. I continue immersing myself in the scriptures, my husband’s history, taking care of myself physically, and giving service.”

What happens at death

The eternal spirit of our loved one leaves the physical body at death and enters the world of spirits to await the universal resurrection when the spirit and body are re-united again, never to separate. On Friday at Jesus Christ’s death, His spirit left his body and went to the spirit world to preach until he was resurrected on Sunday. “…being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit: By which also he went and preached unto the spirits in prison;” (a prison of sin and ignorance). (1 Peter 3: 18-19 in the Bible)

At death our loved one is free of the cares and pains of mortality and will be with other loved ones that previously passed through the portals of death. They will look forward to our joining them.

Dallas Jones, local leader of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The quotes in the article came from Christy Monson, March 2019 in the Ensign. For further discussion call (231) 383-8359 or send an email to [email protected]